A Twist of Things to Come

You've probably heard of it, even if you haven't experienced it. Fan fiction peeps call it "post-fic drop" but I've heard pro writers call it "post novel ennui" or a couple of other things.

But what it is is that thing that happens after you've accomplished a goal, finished something that was important to you, or generally taken some action that involved exposing yourself in some way, or resulted in some amazing growth or revelation on a personal level.

The first thing to happen is generally the joy of accomplishment. In fan fiction, it's getting to the end of a story and sharing it. Even if the feedback is immediate and very positive, eventually it will peter out, and then the darkness comes.

I think for pro writers it is probably different. You finish a story, send it off, wait to hear whether the place you sent it wants it, etc. The process is somewhat longer, and involves little dips. You finish the story. You're proud of it, or at least think it is pretty solid. You've been working hard on it, and it is at least as good as you are capable of making it. You send it out.

Then maybe you put it out of your mind, or you obsess about the details you may have got wrong. The process of rejection or acceptance, possibly followed by a series of even more tweaks. Then you get reviews, maybe. The point is, good or bad, when it's over you feel it.

This week I finally got my hand back in writing for GC. It wasn't my best work, but it was playful and fun. I inserted myself into it, and outed myself as a lusty heterosexual. It sounds weird to say that, but it's true. Coming from my background, there is something transgressive about admitting, or openly reveling in, one's sexuality.

I think my post-article drop had two components. The first is that I linked to it from my personal Facebook page, so that my college (Presbyterian), middle school (fringe Evangelical) friends, and former next door neighbors (young earth creationist Baptists) now all pretty much know that I make a habit of sexually objectifying men.

Just thinking about this makes me smile like a loony. It's liberating, see. But anytime you fight your way out of a mental box, you find yourself OUTSIDE that box going, "Whoa. Where is this? What do I do now?" The box may have sucked, but it was familiar.

The second reason for my post-article drop is tied to something you may have noticed - I have been posting pictures of myself different places for a week or two. (I posted a picture of myself making a rude gesture in the article.)

( Some of them are here, under the cut, to spare you. )

Now, the reason I've been putting my stupid face all over everything is that I'm trying to get used to it. I have a serious aversion to being filmed or photographed, which is fine, except I want to start making videos for GC. Since I don't have an easy stand-in, and to do the things I want to do requires a face/personality, I *have* to get over myself.

So, you're being subjected to pictures of me because I have to get over myself. It's not an ego thing, like I'm thinking I'm so hot that of course you want to see my goofy face every day.

I apologize for subjecting you to my neuroses. If it is any consolation, doing this makes me really freaking uncomfortable. It's just something I have to do, to get over my issues and accomplish what I want to accomplish. It's baby steps, see.

So, I had a major post-article mood drop yesterday, despite the fact that the hits on GC spiked and Filament linked to us and the publisher sent me a nice email. Possibly because of it. The thing is, if I'm going to accomplish what I want to accomplish with GC, I'm going to have to do it myself. To do that, I have to get over my self-image anxiety, and to do that, I'm spamming the world with my goofy mug.

Please bear with me.

Spent the day with the Unschoolers, decorating our group tree at City Park. Had a picnic after. Fun, fun.

In other news, my article about Filament Magazine seems to be getting a lot more traffic than I expected, in part because the Mag actually plugged us on their Facebook page.

I keep reading the article and cringing, wanting to re-write and fiddle and fix. But I'm certain that THIS WAY LIES MADNESS. I must fight the perfection bot trying to consume my brains.

***


I changed my Facebook picture to one of me making a ridiculous face. I did this for two reasons. One, I got tired of looking at the super-bright, pretty one. I looked like a freaking Twilight vampire. Secondly, I'm trying to get used to looking at my face so that doing talking-head review videos will freak me out less.

Let you know how it goes.

... and it's about a sexy women's magazine with with intelligent articles. Check it out: Filament Magazine: Man Candy for Women with Brains.

I think I did pretty well for being a bit rusty.

***

In other news, I posted this video to my Facebook feed with the comment, "This is an amazingly honest interview." It is an interview with a very successful pastor who recently came out as gay to his church:



I got an email saying that an old college buddy had responded to it. His comments below the cut.

( A blast from my past. )

I didn't get the chance to respond, because he deleted his comment. Possibly because he didn't want to get into it with me, either because he caught his fallacious argument, or (more likely) because he knows I am intractably opposed to treating LGBTQ people as second class citizens and he would not change my mind. I hope it wasn't because he thought I would get mean or nasty with him, because I would not have.

Still, this video gives me hope for meaningful change that does not require people to reject their religion wholesale in order to treat others as equal. (Personally, I consider taking an action that would hurt another person for no good reason (i.e. denying them a right I take for granted, such as being able to marry someone I love) to be opposed by most religions on their most basic level. I hope that others will come to see the cultural persecution of people who are different in this light. Actually, I know they will, just maybe not in my lifetime.)

Oy, what a day.

Thursday, Ellen Kushner, one of my favorite writers, tweeted that she was at the Cafe du Monde, and I totally would have driven down there just to fangirl on her if I had seen it in time. But I didn't. I did tweet to tell her so, though,and she tweeted back that she lives to be admired, and we'd have to catch each other next time.

I was, erm, all a-twitter over that. :) Silly, I guess, but there you go. I'd probably have pestered her by saying how badly I want her to write more books, and that wouldn't have been good. One should not call one's favorite author a slacker, especially when one's pot is much blacker than said author's kettle. Ah well. ;)

***

I had to go to my writing group meeting anyway. It was supposed to be a write-in, but we had a new member and ended up talking about everything and getting to know him (and him us). It was crazy and wonderful, one of those group conversations that is so awesome you forget about time and food and generally everything else. I also found out that my co-organizer (while Mer is away taking care of her mom who has cancer) is a big Whovian and Torchwood lover, too. The new guy is an artist and comic book/general geek as well, so we created a geek vortex and generally spun out of conversational control.

It was AWESOME. The geek mind-meld time warp was in full effect. It was six thirty, and then a minute later it was ELEVEN. Wow.

My writing-group curse may be broken. I think I need this sense of community at least as much as I want critique. Plus I think they might be willing to read and give feedback when I'm ready, so I may be able to get both.

***

In GC news, today I posted a fun bit for the Geek Video of the Week involving Roger Ebert and Jon Stewart discussing the relative merits of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles' weapons. It is a thing of beauty which I had to share.

This has been a great week for content on GeekaChicas. I'm really proud of it this week. ;)

Let's start off with Mv2.3's thought-provoking, I'm a Cybercitizen. Now What? What exactly are our responsibilities to our fellow human beings on the internet? If someone tells you they have the intention of committing a crime, what do you do? The comments add some layers to the discussion, too.

Then comes another issue-driven article by Sweet Clementine, A Woman's Perspective on a Man's View of the Ultimate Betrayal. Again, half the joy of this one, for me, was in the comments on the article, which is a clear-eyed reaction to the old saw that men are unfaithful because they are intrinsically unable to abstain from sex when it is offered. I personally think this position takes a very dim view or men, but this article is more of a dissection of that rationale, if you accept the basic weakness of men as a given. It's very thoughtful and thought-provoking and makes me proud of GC in general.

Just for fun, we have Lego Star Wars: Bombad Bounty which gave me the giggles in a big way.

I'm really excited about Taoism and the Eleventh Doctor by Nightsky. It is a follow-up to her Taoism and the Tenth Doctor from last year.

I just *love* her take on all things DW, and seriously suggest that you click on Nightsky's tab and read any of her stuff that you haven't already. She puts forth an analysis of the show that is thorough and psychologically valid. I'm impressed when any show can stand up to that sort of scrutiny, to be honest. I love reading her take on all things Whovian.

I have been a lax webmistress. It all comes of having a brain that can only effectively think of one thing at a time. Oy.

Oh, let's see. Nightsky gave us "The Hobbit" / "Doctor Who" Update of the Day detailing some interesting Doctor Who/Hobbit news and making a case for Tom Baker as king of the Mirkwood elves. Woo-ee.

Then there was our resident vampire, Mv2.3's The Vampire Follies -- An Insider Rant which was a bit of a take-down of the online vampire community. :D

Pearce took another theatrical bullet for us and tells us about it in her review Paranormal Activity Meh.

Beatrice Blythe took a look at some top-tier geek goodness in Clash of the Geeks - Entertaining Insanity for a Good Cause.

Then we got some real casting news from Nightsky in A Pan-Geekdom Hobbit. Martin Freeman!!!

We had agirlnamedluna guest-blogging for an article on Vampire Mob, a really cool web series that you should check out, because it's funny.

Then we had our Geeka-Boo story by Jesse, Fairy Godmother, which stirred up some controversy, and kind of pissed me off as well (mostly from a copy-editing POV, but I guess you get what you pay for, i.e. if I'm not paying for the story, the writer doesn't have to use spell check, capital letters, or punctuation). *sigh* I did stir the pot a bit. I admit it.

Once again, Pearce throws herself in front of the bad movie bus to spare GC readers the pain, in Don't Waste Your Time - More Movie-Related Sacrifice. That woman really knows how to take one for the team! ;)

There was also a lovely book review by Beatrice Blythe, Rereading the Vorkosigan Saga: Mirror Dance. She's refreshing her memory before reading the newest Miles novel. Can't wait for the follow-up!

A Nonny Mouse, GC's resident Geek Overseas, filed an article on ebooks, The Awesomeness of eBooks. Evidently, it's much easier to get ebooks when you're overseas than it is to lay hands on the paper kind. ;) Plus much, much more.

Then we got a post-midterm election rant from Jesse, Are We A Nation of Fools? which honestly got much less of a reaction than I expected, considering the fact that not all GeekaChicas share political opinions. I really thought this one might get more action than it did. Most of GC's contributors do not get political, so I was hoping some controversy might boost our stats. (Yep, I'm mercenary like that.) But no luck.

Pearce profiled a young up-and-coming filmmaker in Tennyson Stead's Shot at the New Filmmaking Model. Fascinating look at a possible new way to finance films.

Today we have Jesse's latest round-up of facts, rumors and speculation about the next Batman film in THE DARK KNIGHT RISES. *crosses fingers* Please, movie gods, bring Cillian Murphy to New Orleans. OHPLEASEOHPLEASEOHPLEASE!! We'll only stalk him a little.

That is all for now, but we have a couple of great articles in the queue!

For those who like adult beverages, there's Pearce's Have a Geek on the Rocks.

Then we have Nightsky's short and to-the-point reportage on the Munsters remake, In Honor of October....

Lastly we have Mv2.3's October -- When Death Gets Jiggy.

In anticipation of creepy fun later in the month, I have a volunteer to write some horror shorts for later in the month. (I'm a little nervous about this because I have never read his work and have no idea of its quality, but it should be interesting, either way.)

First off, the only new thing on GC since I last updated is the Geek Video of the Week, which most of you will already have seen by now. ;) It's way fun, though.

***

One of my dear young friends lives in Boston and is very active in the Moishe/Kavod House (explanation of what it is and does is in the link). Margie Klein, the force of nature behind this Jewish community group involved in issues of the environment, youth and social justice, has been nominated as a Jewish Community Hero, a title that also includes some funding, which they could really use. So if you have a minute or two, please consider tossing her a vote. You can vote every 12 hours. Just sayin'. ;)

In the category "Geekiest Blog." Would much appreciate a vote. ;)

Edited to add link. D'OH!

http://miss-s-b.dreamwidth.org/1091912.html


Also up for voting today is the "Sexiest Blog" category, and one of my favorites, Male Submission Art, is up for it.

I'm actually staying on top of this today! Who knew? ;)

Today's article, Fangks to Keith Budden, Unsung Hero, was one I found particularly interesting. It's about the fellow who caught the first taipan for milking and the development of antivenin. The article isn't romanticized, but it still moved me.

Golly, I love my website. ;)

Also, yesterday I posted the Gaming Paper Giveaway Winner Announcement. It may be sexist of me to admit that I was pleased a femme geek won the paper. I had hoped, GC being a website for teh femme geeks and all that.